What, Me Worry?

As a kid I was a fan of Mad Magazine. I enjoyed the antics of its smiling, freckly, gap-toothed cover boy, Alfred E. Newman. Alfred E. Newman had the perpetual look of a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar -- or should I say with his hand stuck in the cookie jar, as if he was simultaneously afraid of being caught and humored by his predicament. It was a look of bewildered puzzlement. “What, Me Worry?” was his constant refrain. “Sure my hand is stuck and I’m in pain,” he seemed to say. “But this is so absurd I have to laugh.”

As an adult I tried unsuccessfully to turn my kids onto Mad. Alfred E. Newman was still there – he hadn’t aged a week in thirty years. But cookie jars were out of fashion and if it isn’t on a screen it doesn’t count. Alfred would be shocked to find himself lost to the ages in the company of goody two-shoes like Little Lord Fauntleroy.

I was reminded of Alfred E. Newman as I stood in line filling up my gas tank recently. I had to take a picture of the result: 18 gallons cost $77.38 at $4.299/gallon.


Why, not too long ago you could have flown from New York to Fort Lauderdale on Jet Blue for $75! I looked across the island at a young man who was filling up a Honda, probably his first car. He had freckles and was smiling; there was a gap in his front teeth and … could it be? He had this look, as if to say: “What, Me Worry?” In other words: “These prices are so absurd, I’m not sure whether to laugh or to cry, so I might as well laugh.”

Practically every night these days there is a news story that the AAA reports the average price of gasoline hit a new high. Of course, if the average nationwide is $3.60 we can be sure the price in Connecticut will be $4.40; our taxes are among the highest in the country. Now, look closely at the news reporters and you will see that same expression of puzzlement. “Hey, we aren’t making this stuff up. Really: Just go out and look for yourself. It’s unbelievable…”

Let’s face it. We really are faced with a new world. For over a century since the first oil find in Titusville, PA, energy costs were relatively low in the United States compared to other parts of the world. We were blessed with local production and with competitive markets that held down the price of refined products. But over the past few decades declining domestic production, environmental restrictions on new refinery capacity, and increased demand from abroad have shifted the supply and demand balance. As more of the world enjoys the benefits of economic prosperity, we find ourselves in line with everybody else for the globe’s limited energy supplies.

As prices rise to previously inconceivable levels, we feel bewildered and puzzled. Other countries have faced these pressures for years, and have reacted with smaller cars and lower consumption. We know what needs to be done – e.g., conservation, fuel efficiency, alternative energy supplies, new nuclear power plants – but we also know that these are long term solutions. We have been lulled to sleep in a fool’s paradise of low energy prices and suddenly we are waking up to a new economic reality. The situation is so absurd that we don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Absurd or not, we do need to get serious about energy policy. Alfred E. Newman may not have grown up but the rest of us have no excuse. The adults in our nation’s capital need to wake up to the new economic reality. One would hope in a presidential election year there would be serious debate about energy policy. Instead, most of the talk is political posturing about gasoline prices. It is not Exxon’s fault that gasoline prices are high. That company is simply selling its product at the market. If they gave it away their shareholders – people like you and me – would be outraged. We can’t deny the hard working people of the developing world the opportunity to improve their lives.

But we can help introduce competition through alternative energy supplies. We can lower demand by improving the efficiency of our energy guzzling economy. We can expedite inexpensive – and safe – nuclear power plants.

“What, Me Worry?” You betchya. No more cookies for you, Alfred. Time to grow up and get to work!